Monthly Archives: March 2012

Pictures of the Day

Every year Dallas stages a St. Patrick’s Day parade down aptly-named Greenville Avenue, or rather the lower half of it where bars and restaurants crowd the area.  It starts off with a family-friendly parade and 5K run and ends with people getting arrested for public intoxication. 

“May the sun always shine on your windowpane.

May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain.

May the hand of a friend always be near you.

May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you!”

 

Runners wait for the start of the “Dash Down Greenville” 5K on Saturday, March 17, 2012.  Photo: Rex C. Curry

 

People try to catch beads during the parade.  Photo: Kye R. Lee

 

 

Clowns from Hella Shrine in the parade.  Photo: Kye R. Lee

 

St. Patrick’s Day partygoers stop to pet a Dallas Police Department horse.  Photo: Gloria Salinas

 

Riders from Villy Custom ride in the parade.  Photo: Kye R. Lee

 

Kolleen Kiburz of Dallas tries to catch beads during St. Patrick’s Day Parade on Greenville Avenue.  Photo: Kye R. Lee

 

Members of Dallas Fire Rescue Pipes & Drums lead the parade.  Photo: Kye R. Lee

 

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Quote of the Day

“You can’t make anybody watch, okay?  Because you just have to close your eyes.  As long as it’s on the exterior and not the interior.” 

— Republican Pennsylvania Gov. Tom Corbett, off-handedly dismissing concerns about pending state legislation that could require a transvaginal ultrasound for a woman seeking an abortion.  Texas already has a similar law on its books.

Yes, yes, little woman!  Just close your eyes while we ram this rod up your crotch to save you from yourself! 

 

Courtesy ArcaMax Comics

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March 17, 2012 – 278 days Until Baktun 12

Survivalist Tip:  As December 21st approaches, considering stockpiling large quantities of green bananas.  Bananas are probably indigenous to Papua New Guinea, but didn’t gain prominence until after Europeans arrived in the Americas where the fruit also grows.  Bananas are mostly water, but they also contain large amounts of potassium, which is essential for proper functioning of the heart, kidneys and the entire digestive system.  And, in the upheaval of the apocalypse, the last thing you want to worry about is a digestive issue, like incontinence.  You’ll have enough shit to deal with already.  I emphasize green bananas because you obviously don’t want them to ripen too soon and you don’t know how long chaos will rule. Bananas will help you survive the uncertainty – until your favorite natural foods store re-opens.

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On March 17…

461 – St. Patrick died at Saul, Downpatrick, Ireland.

 

1762 – New York City hosted the first St. Patrick’s Day parade in the United States.

 

1776 – British forces evacuated Boston, chased out by troops under Gen. George Washington.

 

1897 – Motion pictures of a championship prize fight were taken for the first time as ‘Sunny’ Bob Fitzsimmons knocked out ‘Gentleman’ Jim Corbett for the world heavyweight title.

 

1906 – President Theodore Roosevelt coined the word ‘muckrake’ in a speech that he delivered to the Gridiron Club in Washington, D.C.

 

1907 – America’s first bowling tournament for women began in St. Louis, MO, with almost 100 women participating in the event.

1910 – The Camp Fire Girls organization was founded at Lake Sebago, ME by Luther and Charlotte Gulick.

1941 – The National Gallery of Art was officially opened by U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt in Washington, D.C.

 

1969 – Golda Meir, a Milwaukee high school teacher, was sworn in as Prime Minister of Israel.

 

1985 – William Schroeder set a record for heart transplant patients as he reached his 113th day of life with the artificial organ.

 

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Today’s Birthdays

Composer – jazz musician Paul Horn (Green Jelly Beans, Dancing Children) is 82.

 

Singer Adam Wade (Take Good Care of Her, The Writing on the Wall) is 77.

 

Guitarist Paul Kantner (Jefferson Airplane) is 71.

 

Cito Gaston, former baseball player and manager of the Toronto Blue Jays; World Series titles (1992-1993); first black manager to win Series, is 68.

 

Musician – songwriter John Sebastian (Lovin’ Spoonful) is 68.

 

Drummer Harold Brown (War) is 66.

 

Actor Patrick Duffy (Man from Atlantis, Dallas) is 63.

 

Guitarist Scott Gorham (Thin Lizzy) is 61.

 

Actor Kurt Russell (Elvis, Escape from New York) is 61.

 

Actress Lesley-Anne Down (Upstairs, Downstairs; The Great Train Robbery) is 58.

 

Keyboardist Mike Lindup (Level 42) is 53.

 

Actor Rob Lowe (St. Elmo’s Fire, About Last Night) is 48.

 

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Cartoon of the Day

 

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Picture of the Day

Bluebonnets bloom along a Texas highway.  Despite a year-long drought and a warm winter, the state flower is popping up in abundance.

 

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Quote of the Day

“Why did they not stop the killings?  These soldiers at the camp spy with expensive equipment on all that happens, from the ground and from the air.” 

– Haji Nuur Mohammed, 60, who lives in Zangiabad, Afghanistan where a U.S. soldier killed 16 civilians.  The soldier has been identified as Robert Bales.

 

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Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

I don’t normally celebrate St. Patrick’s Day, but I’ve always found Ireland enchanting.  For one thing, it’s the primary source of the world’s redheads.  But, there’s something about the island nation that’s still mystical and enigmatic.  Perhaps, if I actually visited the place, I might end up with a different opinion.  But, a cousin of mine who’s been there more than once has nothing but good things to say about Ireland. 

Part of the fascination surrounds the life of the very man whom we celebrate today – St. Patrick.  Not much is known about his early life, but oddly – and this will destroy many leprechaun dreams – St. Patrick wasn’t even Irish; he was born around A.D. 390 across the sea in that evil Protestant empire more commonly known as England.  He supposedly grew up in an aristocratic Christian family, surrounded by servants, and professed no interest in proselytizing.  Legend declares – as legends are wont to do – that Patrick was kidnapped around age 16 and taken to Ireland where he was forced to tend sheep on a cold forbidding mountainside. 

After about 7 years, Patrick heard a voice in his dreams telling him to escape; whereupon he found passage on a pirate ship back to England and reunited with his family.  Then, he apparently had another dream where that voice, or perhaps another voice told him to return to Ireland and try like hell to convert those heathenous pagans to Christianity.  He became ordained in the Anglican Church and traveled back to Ireland to begin his mission. 

He allegedly used a shamrock, a 3- leaved plant, to explain the Holy Trinity to the Irish people.  After about 30 years of evangelism, Patrick died on March 17, 462, and was buried in Downpatrick. 

By the 9th century A.D., the Irish had come to revere Patrick as their patron saint.  In the early 1600’s, Saint Patrick’s Day became a holy day for Roman Catholics in Ireland.  But, it wasn’t until 1903 that St. Patrick’s Day became an official public holiday in Ireland. 

So, to all my Irish friends and acquaintances, here’s to you – whether you’re Catholic or Celtic!

 

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Official Liquid-Plumr Double Impact Commercial

This may be the official Liquid-Plumr commercial, but it’d probably drive the conservative right crazy and piss off the feminist left.  So I can’t see it on the air any time soon.  Enjoy nonetheless!  I think I missed my true calling in life – advertising.  What did you think?  Plumbing?!  Get your minds out of the drain!  But, leave me a number where I can reach you after midnight.

 

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