“Lawyer lawsuits? We’re talking about the impeachment of a president of the United States, duly elected, and the managers are complaining about lawyer lawsuits? The Constitution allows lawyer lawsuits. It’s disrespecting the Constitution of the United States to even say that in this chamber. Lawyer lawsuits.”
– Jay Sekulow, personal attorney to Donald Trump, apparently misunderstanding the term FOIA (Freedom of Information Act)
Sekulow flew into a rage because he misheard a common legal phrase. Representative Val Demings, one of the impeachment managers, had said, “The president’s lawyers may suggest that the House should have sought – that this House should have sought these materials in court, or awaited further lawsuits under the Freedom of Information Act, a.k.a. FOIA lawsuits.” She repeated term “FOIA lawsuits,” which must have struck Sekulow as unfamiliar.
As we often say here in Texas, ‘Bless his heart.’ Or in more common vernacular, ‘Dumb ass!’
“We want to thank Governor Herbert and his administration for not allowing this issue to be politicized. He saw how polarizing this was becoming, and he made the decision to allow science to prevail over politics. He kept his word to the LGBTQ community, and we are deeply grateful to him.”
– Troy Williams, executive director of Equality Utah, after the state of Utah banned “conversion therapy” for minors.
Conversion therapy is an ancient ritual where devoutly social conservatives try to beat or exorcise homosexual inclinations from people. Here in the U.S. it’s been connected to high rates of suicide among teenagers. I’ve personally seen this action. It’s call the Roman Catholic Church.
“Dear All Technology, Remember the 90’s when you just WORKED??? I don’t need a ‘smart’ feature on my TV, thermostat, lights, music, refrigerator, security cameras, and f-ing car. You’re a major pain in all of our asses. You’re not worth it. Signed, Everyone.” – 12:10 PM · Jan 7, 2019
– Chris Evans
Alas, Chris, you can’t reason with technology any more than you can reason with politicians, toddlers, rap singers and angry felines. Someone once told me technology was only as smart as the people using it. I promptly retorted that technology was only as smart as the people who designed it. And, since most of us who use technology are actually smarter than most of those who design it, we’re all trapped in a vicious cycle of circuitous frustration.
“You’re a liberal hack. I’m not talking to you.”
– Senator Martha McSally, Arizona Republican, to CNN reporter Manu Raju who asked if the Senate should consider new evidence as part of its impeachment trial.
McSally later tweeted a cell phone video of the terse exchange, apparently recorded by one of her aides, and is now trying to raise money over the incident.
“I usually get angry when members of my tribe worship at the feet of Trump. This time, I just felt sad.”
– John Fea, history professor at Messiah College in Mechanicsburg, PA, describing his reaction to a Donald Trump rally at King Jesus International Ministry in Miami.
In his editorial, Fea went on to write: “I am used to this kind of thing from Trump, but I was stunned when I witnessed evangelical Christians – those who identify with the “good news” of Jesus Christ – raising their hands in a posture of worship as Trump talked about socialism and gun rights. I watched my fellow evangelicals rising to their feet and pumping their fists when Trump said he would win reelection in 2020. Trump spent the evening mocking his enemies, trafficking in half-truths in order to instill fear in people whom God commands to “fear not,” and proving that he is incapable of expressing anything close to Christian humility.”
“You know what? Trump is a test whether you’re even saved. Only saved people can love Trump.”
– TV evangelist Jim Bakker, the “Jim Bakker Show”
Bakker’s comment actually elicited a few laughs from the show’s studio audience. Donald Trump – who has ingratiated himself with far-right Christians and somehow found Jesus squatting in the basement of his Manhattan skyscraper – once declared that he’d never asked God for forgiveness. And, when you have that much money, who needs God?!
Those of us in the U.S. of a “Certain Age” vividly recall the Jim Bakker of the 1980s; the self-proclaimed preacher who, along with his perky makeup-clad wife, Tammy Fay, spent more time promoting his godly hotline seeking donations than actually preaching the word of God – whatever that’s supposed to mean. His and other evangelical scandals of the period were the worst of daytime dramas (the fluff formerly known as “soap operas”), but provided delicious fodder for the tabloid press and comedians.