Survivalist Tip: One thing you have to check in your vehicle is the motor oil. No vehicle can function without it. It’s the single most essential lubricant for the engine. If you’re starting to get sexually excited, stop and get hold of yourself. On second thought, get hold of something else – like the wall – and start concentrating. This is serious! Motor oil has 3 primary functions:
- It prevents all the metal surfaces in your engine from grinding together and tearing themselves apart due to friction. If you hear a nasty grinding sound coming from the engine, chances are your motor oil level is low. Either that, or you were speeding through a school zone.
- It suspends all the nasty by-products of engine combustion, such as acid and insect refuse.
- It minimizes exposure to oxygen, which at high temperatures, can damage the engine.
Motor oil comes in 2 types: mineral and synthetic. Mineral oil is a natural substance that comes from the Earth. Do not confuse it with the type you use for cooking. Synthetic – as the name implies – is concocted in a lab. Since I place scientific labs in the same category as government agencies and utility companies, I don’t trust them and therefore, recommend you use mineral-based motor oil, specifically 10W-40. You’ll have to change it more often, but it’s best for you and your vehicle.
As December 21 approaches, you need to change the motor oil in your vehicle. Regular oil changes prevent something called “Black Death.” Usually when people think of “Black Death,” they conjure up images of medieval, rat-infested Europe. But, in this case “Black Death” simply means sludge. This is not the chocolate sludge delight you get at a chocolate festival. This is the gunk that builds up in your engine when you don’t maintain it properly. Similar gunk builds up in your intestines and refrigerator, but I don’t have time for that. If your vehicle’s engine has developed sludge, you just need to have it flushed out completely. Consider this an enema for the engine. I know that sounds nasty, but I’m trying to emphasize the importance of engine maintenance.
You don’t know how long it’ll take for things to settle down after the apocalypse. But, if you have to travel a long distance, you can be assured your vehicle will help you reach safety. Then, you can enjoy all the chocolate sludge in the “New Universe!”
Chief Writing Wolf 