“How did the giant tarantula get to the other side of the lake?”
“It swam! How else is it supposed to get there? Levitate?”
“Hey! What’s that eight-legged monstrosity doing in the water?!”
“The front stroke, you dipshit!”
“Besides water, what do humans and spiders have in common?”
“Not a damn thing!”
“What do you say to a king-sized spider about to jump in the river?”
“Nothing, you moron! You just get the hell out of there!”
“What did the titanic tarantula say to the trout before eating it?”
“How the hell should I know?! I don’t get that close to spiders! Or fish!”
Chief Writing Wolf 