In a perfect example of rushing to judgment, film director Spike Lee now apologizes for sending out the wrong Sanford, FL, address for George Zimmerman. The elderly retired couple who actually lives there is now residing at a motel. Note some of the first responses to Lee’s “mistake.”
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This will get blood pressures rising! Dwayne Booth, aka “Mr. Fish,” isn’t one to shy away from controversy.
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Finally! Someone in the clergy makes sense! Where have they been for the past 1,000 years?
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“If you’re asked to give an example of how you can show yourself to be morally upright to your airmen, the only answer you can give is go to chapel, because that’s the only example they give. This is not something somebody left in the break room [to read] — this is official Air Force policy.”
— An Air Force captain, criticizing materials used in the Squadron Officer School urging company-grade officers to attend chapel to show their moral integrity.
I haven’t been to a chapel in years! In fact, I’m afraid to enter a Baptist church for fear I might start foaming at the mouth.
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Survivalist Tip: You should have plenty of vitamin A on hand. Vitamin A is known as Retinol, which refers to the retina. This means obviously that it’s good for the eyes. And, in the chaos of the apocalypse aftermath, your eyesight will be extremely crucial. Keen eyesight will help you locate food, medicine, chocolate and other essentials, as well as helping to prevent you from falling victim to such varmints as zombies and any reality TV show cast members who should survive. The ancient Mayans valued keen eyesight in their jungle environment. Remember, they helped refine the first writing system to develop in the Western Hemisphere. With eyesight like that, you’ll always be safe!
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Chocolate lovers can rejoice in their near-vindication. A study conducted by the Department of Medicine at the University of California, San Diego, alleges that adults who eat chocolate on a regular basis are actually thinner than those who don’t! Again, this is nothing concrete, but the results dare to suggest that “regular chocolate consumption might be calorie-neutral.” In other words, it won’t make you the fat-ass that those bitches who founded Jenny Craig say it will. Scientists already proved that chocolate has some health benefits, mainly because it contains flavonoids, which act as antioxidants. They, in turn, help prevent damage to various parts of the body. I’m sure further research will be warranted, especially from the likes of Richard Simmons. In the meantime, chocolatiers will most certainly have to prepare for a rush on orders. I mean, why wait for a special occasion?! This news is special enough!
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If yours is today also, “Happy Birthday!”
Actress Conchata Ferrell (L.A. Law, Mystic Pizza, Edward Scissorhands) is 69.
Actor Ken Howard (The White Shadow, The Thorn Birds) is 68.
Bass guitarist Chuck Portz (The Turtles) is 67.
Actress Dianne Wiest (Hannah and Her Sisters, Bullets over Broadway, Edward Scissorhands) is 64.
Sprinter Ronnie Ray Smith (1968 Olympics gold medal winner: 4-by-100 meter relay [w/Charles Greene, Melvin Pender & Jim Hines]) is 63.
Singer Reba McEntire is 57.
Singer Cheryl James (Salt; Salt-N-Pepa) is 46.
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1776 – Juan Bautista de Anza arrived at what is now San Francisco, CA, with 247 colonists.
1797 – Nathaniel Briggs of New Hampshire patented the washing machine.
1891 – The first world championship for amateur weightlifters was held in London.
1898 – In United States v. Wong Kim Ark, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that children born in the United States to Chinese immigrants are American citizens.
1922 – Bradley A. Fiske of Washington, D.C. patented a microfilm reading device.
1939 – The Spanish Civil War ended, as King Alfonso XIII approved elections to decide Spain’s government.
1969 – President Dwight D. Eisenhower died in Washington, D.C. at age 78.
1979 – A reactor overheated at the Three Mile Island nuclear facility near Harrisburg, PA, generating the worst nuclear accident in U.S. history.
1990 – President George H. W. Bush presented the Congressional Gold Medal posthumously to Jesse Owens for his humanitarian contributions. The medal was given to Owens’ widow, Ruth S. Owens.
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Chief Writing Wolf 